Out on My Ear

Well, any vacation plans I had are probably going to have to be canceled now. Much to my disappointment, I find myself unemployed. I must say this comes as a complete shock, since I had every reason to believe that I was doing just fine, making good progress in learning how to use the system and dealing with customers just fine. All of my customers liked me, and in fact, I often got praise from them. Evidently that was not sufficient. All during the last three months, I have been told that I was doing fine, that they expected it to be 6 months before I could be considered fully trained, and at least a year before I was comfortable with the system.

I was told today, however that because of order entry mistakes and because apparently someone has the impression that I don't ask questions, and am resistant to having people help me, that they felt I was not going to be a good fit with the company. How very disappointing. Especially given that I ask plenty of questions. The real issue as far as I can tell, is that I did not a specific someone questions when *she* thought I should, or when *she* thought I was struggling with something that I was not asking questions. The fact of the matter was that I did ask plenty of questions. I just chose to ask the team leader instead, and had asked my boss that this person not interrupt me when I was live with a customer. The fact that this person spent an hour in my boss's office right before lunch, and that I was called in to be dismissed just after, tips me off that she was probably in there badmouthing me, which I suspect has been the case more than once. For instance, I was asked on one occasion not to park my car so close to anyone else's cars, that someone had complained that I was parked too close to them, and that since they all had nice cars, it was understandable. The subtext to that is that *I* do not have a nice car... but actually drive a piece of junk that I still can't afford to replace, and now probably won't for a while. I know who it was that made that complaint too. This was the first time I'd heard anything about my 'resistance' to having anyone help me... (which wasn't true) and that was 6 weeks ago, after which I made a point of asking as many questions as I could come up with. I loved my job, partly because I thought it was a pretty nice environment free of office politics. Evidently that was not the case. I'm sorely disappointed.

Actually... I'm mad... but I'm amazed at how calm I am... how well I managed to maintain my dignity while I collected my things and went out the door. I even made a point of letting my boss know that there was work in my inbox that was going to have to be forwarded. Oh they were all very nice about it... but it doesn't particularly make me feel any better for having been relieved of my job with no warning at all that there was anything really wrong, other than 6 weeks ago, being told that I might not be asking enough questions. Frankly if my boss felt my call times were too long because I didn't understand what I was doing, it might have behooved them to listen in a few times and see if that were the case, and if it were, to have someone sit with me for a few days again, to train me better, rather than just let me blithely go on thinking I was doing fine.

I haven't decided what I'm going to do yet. I supposed I could go back to Relay.. but I have my doubts about my car holding up to the stress... I could probably hack pizza and make just as much or more money, but again... the question of whether my car could handle it is questionable. I need to get my lawsuit settled, and I will be on the phone with the lawyer Monday early... He's had long enough to sit on it. Now he can act in my behalf as he was hired to do rather than hemming and hawing about how much he thinks we should ask for.