ishte | Resolutions

Yah.. I don't make them. I've said so. Generally speaking they are just a way to set yourself up for failure or disappointment. But I've got a couple now that I've thought about this a bit.

I will no longer hang out with people who are bent on destroying themselves and dragging others down with them. Sorry guys, but I won't do it. I won't be a part of it. So basically if you are still living in a world of the negative, abusing various chemicals, destroying your lungs, your health, your appearance, your mental well being, do not expect to see much of me. I find it has much more to do with that than obnoxious behavior. The fact that you don't care about yourselves enough to care for yourselves is why your behavior towards others has become so obnoxious really. It doesn't mean I don't care about you. I just can't be around you.
Living on $12,000 a year and having $13,000 in the most basic of household expenses every year is not flying with me. I'm sick of trying to figure out where the other $1000 is coming from. I'm sick of having to rent out a room. I will get a better job. Period.
I will sell this house. Nuff said.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

I know you are not a fan of putting filty chemicals in the lungs and I can't blame you, but please just give me some credit and don't hate me, I am quitting and it's a good thing right? I can be healther and start running again! I used to do that alot, it helped me fitler out my anger and stuff. I already feel much better. I have been weaning myself and now smoke very little...I suck on old people horehounds all damn day and my teeth hurt like hell, but no cigs YAY!!

I wouldn't hate you for smoking anyway. I have to look at smoking that way for myself to remind me why I don't want to smoke. I quit about 5 years ago and then started again when I started hanging out with smokers again a lot... then quit when I wasn't....then started again when I was hanging out with smokers. But it's not just smoking that makes me want to stay away from the people in my list above. It's got more to do with just plain self abuse. Not just smoking, but drug use, self loathing, self destructive behavior.

I can tell you from experience that people change and grow, and drift apart from each other and sometimes come back into each others circles and sometimes not. You're in your 20's and that's a time when a lot of that happens because of the changes in family life and all that. It doesn't happen to everyone, you know? I mean not all your friends will drift away because of it. It just depends on individual personalities. Some of my friends when we grew up, and they got married, or had boyfriends, it seemed like they became their boyfriend and didn't have space for me any more. Others that didn't happen to. (some people are just better a managing their time and multitasking... and in some cases standing up to mates who don't want to take the time to get to know their girl's friends.) You're kind of ahead of the game. You've already got your little family, and are used to balancing your time with all that, and school and stuff. I don't know if that makes you feel any better about it. I have a friend (I just talked to her in fact about a birthday party of another mutual friend who we have both known since 7th grade or so.. )I think I was in 8th when I met the birthday girl who is in my class and the other was in 7th that year... or coming into 7th... not sure... too long ago... but the point is our friendship is old enough to buy booze. ^_~ And we have gone through some rough periods, and periods where we didn't have time for each other, or she didn't have time for me, or I didn't have time for her but it's endured for um... 27 (!!!! O_o just actually calculated this!!) years. Some of your friendships will too. This post is probably too long. I'll make another one..

Anyway, this deserves another post anyway.

Hooray for you for deciding to quit. It's a great choice. and hard. No doubt there. I'll give you some unsolicited pointers that I just gave another friend who quit on Wednesday.

first one you're doing already cutting back, finding something to help you with the oral fixation.

second break your routine. I did it by making myself get up and go outside to smoke first, then not allowing smoking in the car... so any time I wanted to smoke, if I was inside, I had to stop what I was doing and go outside. (makes winter smoking very unpleasant, you'd be surprised how much less you smoke when you have to bundle up and stand out in the windy icy wasteland with the warm house behind you. If I was in the car, like on a long trip it meant actually stopping at a rest stop and wasting 10 minutes off my travel time to smoke. That's a big deal to me. I like to drive, but I'm always proud when I can make Grand Rapids in 5 hours without speeding (much, because you know how that goes when you've been on the road a while it creeps up until you notice)

When you have got yourself cut back pretty far, you need to set an end date. Say... January 25. "On January 25, I'm not going to smoke any more." and then quit.. do not keep an emergency smoke anywhere, you'll set yourself up for destruction. Tell all your smoking friends that you are quitting and to please be strong enough to argue with you when you beg them for a smoke, or better yet to please be strong enough to not smoke around you for a while until YOU are stronger.

There is no shame in using an aid. I used the patch with great success.. the dreams were WILD... and it worked very well for me taking off the initial edge of the cravings so that the non-smoker voice could overpower the smoker voice in the mental smoking arguments. (these are inevitable, you will start arguing with yourself... you're not nuts... get your non-smoker voice in practice now shouting down the smoker voice... start reciting reasons not to smoke, and say NO... over and over.. every time you pass a place where you can buy smokes "NO!" hee hee.. I know it sounds nuts.) Others I have known have used the gum and liked it better because it fed the oral fixation.... I liked the patch because it was as set amount... and let me learn to deal with the habit FIRST and then the addiction as I stepped down. NOTE: the equate brand, or Walgreens brand is just as good as name brand, and costs less.

Lastly, after you quit, every day, put the money you would have spent on smokes (like $5 now isn't it?) in a coffee can... it will stack up very quickly. think about this... $5 a day... that's $35 a week... that's $1820 a year... (about $152 a month.) so by the end of the year next year, you'll have enough for a very nice yuletide for you and the kiddies... or a nice little nest egg for emergencies or whatever. It's a great incentive to just look at that money.

Good will to you... (I say "will" because it's not luck you need it's will...) and I know you can do it. Feel free to email me if you want more ideas. I know that the stop smoking sites aren't very helpful.. they tell you everything you already know, why you want to quit, but not much on how.

Yes I am down to like two a day now, I still have not broken and actually baught a pack which is, good but it is very hard. I don't smoke in the house, and it does really cukk to be standing outside in the cold. I do like to smoke in the car, but haven't...Man, that's so hard. Today I am going to buy some mint lfie savers ( can't chew gum, hurts my teeth). I can already see all the points you have made and I am glad to hear I am not nuts. Coo I do in fact talk to myself!

I can say the battle is hardley over and that the challenge is work for me. I work at the hospital as a tech and all w do is smoke... ( well not literally) But when things get real strssed on the unit, which they always do; we can go outside and relieve the damn stress. That is very hard. Thankfully yesterday the unit was extreamly busy and I didn't have time to think about nicotine, but still found myself getting antsy and annoyed. I am so annoyed now, and I have no LOGICAL reason to be except, I can't smoke. I do really apppreciate all the advice and I am sure I will be emailing you for more or just to rant...heh heh...

I am keeping myself busy and I decided that I want to start walking or jogging in the mornings. I have to start getting up really early for clincals...I mean like 5am, which is early for me...I don't get up 'till aleast 7:30/8. I have been also writting like no tomarrow which keeps me busy...just random things...but still keeping busy.
Thanks so much!

Resolutions

continuence...

Re: continuence...

Re: continuence...

Thanks so much!!!